[ weh. mightyena. too good for this world. odin scritches him behind his ears. maybe there's meat in the kitchen he can feed him or something. he'll have to look before archie goes home. ]
I mean... it's not something I "thought". It was a fact, I was a coward. There was a war going on and I was too scared to do anything. Someone was always there to save me when I was in trouble, and even though I knew how to fight, I was always screwing up somehow. There were these... [ he hesitates. he's not really ready to explain what zombies are. ] There were these wild animals in my homeland - we called them Risen. They were weak, but there were a lot of them? One of them killed my dad because I was busy being scared and he dived in the way of the shot to protect me. He was too strong of a man to fall to something like that, but 'cause of me... yeah. Then my mom, she-- [ nope, actually. that's enough. he shuts the fuck up. not talking about her. ]
It was war. I wasn't equipped to deal with it. My bloodline is full of these, like, amazing legendary heroes, royal men and women who had saved the world countless times, and then there was me, who would shake and cry at the slightest provocation and wind up getting people dead. I was in a position where people looked up to me, and I let them down. I wish I could say it was just in my head, but sometimes the bad thoughts you have about yourself are real. So, yeah.
Like I said. It was a long time ago. I'm better, mostly. I've been a lot more neurotic and pathetic since coming here, 'cause I've never been without backup before, but. I'm better. Nights are just hard.
no subject
I mean... it's not something I "thought". It was a fact, I was a coward. There was a war going on and I was too scared to do anything. Someone was always there to save me when I was in trouble, and even though I knew how to fight, I was always screwing up somehow. There were these... [ he hesitates. he's not really ready to explain what zombies are. ] There were these wild animals in my homeland - we called them Risen. They were weak, but there were a lot of them? One of them killed my dad because I was busy being scared and he dived in the way of the shot to protect me. He was too strong of a man to fall to something like that, but 'cause of me... yeah. Then my mom, she-- [ nope, actually. that's enough. he shuts the fuck up. not talking about her. ]
It was war. I wasn't equipped to deal with it. My bloodline is full of these, like, amazing legendary heroes, royal men and women who had saved the world countless times, and then there was me, who would shake and cry at the slightest provocation and wind up getting people dead. I was in a position where people looked up to me, and I let them down. I wish I could say it was just in my head, but sometimes the bad thoughts you have about yourself are real. So, yeah.
Like I said. It was a long time ago. I'm better, mostly. I've been a lot more neurotic and pathetic since coming here, 'cause I've never been without backup before, but. I'm better. Nights are just hard.