h2no | IC contact

[he does do a shot, but it loosens him up in the worst way possible. archie shifts and leans against magnus, putting his head on the Large Burly Shoulder.]

Magnus...

[he sighs, EVEN MORE MISERABLY. somehow.]

I don't think he loves me anymore.

Aw, buddy.

[ Okay. This, he can handle. So he doesn't like seeing Archie miserable, but it's better than getting nothing out of him. If he knows what the problem is, he can fix it. If he can't fix it, then, uh... well, he can talk about it? Talking's good for you! Opens up them tear ducts and gets things flowing! Step one to getting over this.

And this appears to be a break-up, which is not territory that Magnus is even remotely familiar with, but whatever, he's gonna wing it. Gonna wing it so good. ]

I didn't know you guys were together like that, but... this is the first time you've seen him after your whole thing, right?

[he nods, silently and miserably.

mumbled:] I don't wanna let go, though...

I'm not saying that's what's gonna happen! Just that, like... man, I don't know what the guy's thinking, or feeling, but I have a feeling that he needs time to figure shit out. You've had time here. He hasn't.

[ Magnus sighs, and wraps one arm comfortably around Archie's shoulders, so he doesn't have to talk directly into his shoulder anymore. ]

Did he say he didn't want to see you anymore? Because love - you don't fall out of love that quickly.

No...

[he pulls his legs up to his chest, making a sad lil bean shape.]

But maybe you do after the shit we did. He deserves better than me, anyway.

Edited 2017-10-17 18:09 (UTC)

I dunno about that. I think you're pretty great.

[ Magnus can say that easily and without reservation, but then again, he has the luxury of knowing Archie only after he feels remorse over the horrible thing he'd done. It's so much easier to learn affection for someone who's struggling to get better than someone who's still entrenched in their own delusions. ]

But what I think doesn't really matter. What has he said about it?

[...which is one of his major worries. if he ever backslides enough to be like that again, he has no doubts he'll lose the friends he has. archie still sometimes thinks how he is now is a fake persona, well and truly unsure of his real personality.]

He doesn't like talking about it and avoids me.

Okay. Okay, so... here's where I'm at. If he really didn't love you anymore, he'd say so. It'd be the kind thing to do. It'd be the right thing to do, even - nobody deserves being left in the dark like that.

[ And, Magnus privately considers, it would be the easiest thing to do. To tell someone I don't love you anymore, don't contact me again is hard in the moment, but it's a nice, clean break you can move on from. He doubts that anyone Archie's fell in with is the kind of person to leave someone else hanging like this when they could end things with a word. ]

If he's not saying so, then it's gotta be more complicated than that.

Maybe I deserve it.

[sorry magnus we're in self hate town now.]

[ Oh, man. Oh, man, he is not ready to have this talk. He had a whole thing ready about just talking to Matt, but instead they're down to what Magnus suspects is the real problem, and what's always the real problem: Archie kinda hates himself.

Which sucks. It sucks when somebody you think is great hates themselves, because there's honestly no way of talking them out of it - or at least very few ways that Magnus can think of, which is why he's just going to try it anyway. ]

No, no no no, none of that. Nobody deserves it, [ Magnus says, taking both hands and gripping onto Archie's shoulders, firm as ever. ] Not even you. Especially not you. You're doing better, Arch, you're doin' - you're doing so much better! You've been helping people! Animals! You deserve a second chance, and I'm willing to bet if I knocked down that guy's door right now, he'd agree with me.

[ He's not going to do that. And maybe Matt wouldn't agree! But if he did do that, he would just make faces in the background until Matt hopefully agreed, because that's what rational adults do. ]

[he doesn't resist when magnus takes his shoulders, but he does look away, like he's pointedly avoiding magnus's gaze (because he is).]

I'm not doin' anything special, I'm just not trying to end the fucking world again.

So, one, you're doing a hell of a lot more than that, pal. And two...

[ Magnus shrugs. ]

What's so bad about just living your life?

[ To be normal is all that anyone owes anyone, Magnus figures. He favours the life of a hero and certainly chases after it with reckless abandon, but that's because he doesn't have his normal life anymore. All of the people who fought beside him wanted the same thing - just to live their lives without having to hurt anyone else.

If all Archie does with the rest of his life is live peacefully without hurting anyone else around him, he's doing a damn sight better than most of the world. ]

I'm a bad person. Even when I'm trying not to I end up fucking things up for other people.

[he's still looking away.]

I guess my brain's not wired right or something. I always make the wrong choice.

[ Archie tried to something truly heinous. Magnus won't argue that. But he never actually did it - never actually seems to have hurt or killed anyone. Intentions aside, that makes Archie a damn sight better than most people he knows.

Hell, it makes Archie a better person than Magnus. ]

I mean... you haven't fucked anything up for me, [ he points out, nothing but earnestness in his expression. Meeting Taako and Merle marked a long march towards figuring out how to be happy again. Meeting Archie, though - that marked a march towards figuring out a different kind of happiness, one that's as wonderful as it is fragile. Magnus doesn't figure that Archie knows that, exactly, and it's not something he's keen on sharing, but it's the truth nevertheless. ]

I dunno about all those other guys, but knowing you makes my life better. And you can't argue with that one, 'cause that's the Authentic Magnus Experience.

Maaa-haaaa-haaaags!!

[he is SOBBING okay. he was quiet and Self-Hating™ before, but now he's just WEEPING OPENLY like a war widow. what the fuck! this sweet boy!!]

...

I...I like the Magnus Experience.

[he tries to offer a pathetic little smile, despite the gross tears running down his face.]

Awwww, buddy! Buddy!

[ Don't make Magnus cry too, Archie! He's a sympathetic crier! To avoid this eventuality, he tugs Archie in for a bone-crushing hug, because there's a limit to how upset you can be when being mashed into Magnus' chest. ]

Everyone likes the Magnus Experience! [ That's a lie. Many people do not like the Magnus Experience. The Magnus Experience is a lot. But Magnus wouldn't be himself if he didn't charge ahead as though everyone likes him anyway. ]

Seriously, though. You didn't fuck anything up with me, and I'm pretty damn sure there's more of us out there than you think. You're your own biggest critic.

[he's still weeping in between magnus's boobies because when you're a person like archie, you can't just switch it off. even if breathing is hard because you're face first in someone's chest. crobat looks a little upset that it can't get to him.

it takes him a while and he's barely calmed down; archie thinks of how he's here with a trusted friend being able to vent his frustrations and matt has no-one. he feels unbelievably selfish and forces himself to stop... well. feeling.

healthy.]

Because I know I did something fucked up to him!

Yeah, well, we all fuck up sometimes.

[ Magnus especially. He's killed, like, a lot of people, and is indirectly responsible for countless more. It happens. He pats Archie's back. ]

You need to talk to him. For real. Not, like, avoiding it or anything, just shoot straight with each other, yeah? Otherwise you're gonna keep getting all twisted and circles, and then you'll never admit you can fuck up with one person and do great with another.

[he nods, red eyed and sniffling. feeling like some kind of petulant child. hating himself a lot 👌]

...Thanks.

Is that thank you Magnus, you're a great friend, or thank you Magnus, I'm one-hundo percent gonna talk to him?

[ It has to be the latter, or else this will never end. ]

Thank you Magnus, you're a great friend, I'm gonna talk to him one hundo per cent, also you're really buff and pretty and the best with axes.

Yay.

IC contact

magnus doesn't deserve this gay drama

wrong, his nosy ass deserves every second of it

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